Some things in my head right now...

For once I'd like to be the one in my life that doesn't have to fix things.
The one that doesn't have the be the grown up and end the fight.
I'd like to be the one that doesn't call the plumber when the disposal gets jammed.
I don't want to be the to have to figure out how to make us get along again.
I hate being the type of girl that lets guys get away with things.
I'm tired of being a better friend then my friends are to me.
I'm done always wondering in the back of my mind what people are really thinking.
I don't want to be the only one that shows up when things are bad.
For once I'd like to just call in sick when I'm just not feeling like showing up.
I wish I could be as catty as some and only spend time with people when I'm not getting along with others.
I wish I didn't have to vacuum.
I don't like how I feel when people tell me how lucky I am and I have to question them in my mind.
I wish I didn't have to fake it.
God dammit I wish I could trust you.
Why is it always me that feels like throwing up after a fight.
Sometimes I wish things were the same as they were when we were kids... so there were free do-overs.
I wish I didn't still worry about what my mom thinks of me.
Why can't I turn the spare bedroom into a darkroom? Isn't that what curtains are made for anyway?
I want my life to be like a movie... sad in the beginning but happy by the end. And with a professional hair and makeup crew.
I wish all the pictures in my head could come out on paper.
I don't want to be just a wife.
I'm starting to hate the smell of popcorn.
Does anyone ever listen to what I'm saying?